THE Ugliest patch ever made! :-o

I've had a blast with this patch the past several years (proving that when life hands you crap, make CRAP-AID! :-p). It's proven to be a remarkable trader, if ONLY so that someone ELSE, may share in the bragging rights, of owning a piece of Scouting history: the UGLIEST patch, EVER made!

As every patch has a story to tell, this one is no different, and as I must bear partial responsibility for this monstrosity (and they say confession is good for the soul...), then I must 'come clean,' as it were, and explain this abomination as best as possible.

The story begins, shortly after my arrival to Tri-State Area Council as a District Executive, in late summer of 1998 (a couple weeks before the major All-Hands Conference, where the Venturing Program/Division was officially rolled out, for a Scouting reference point). As we were in a staff meeting that fall, preparing for the upcoming '99 FOS campaign, ideas were solicited for a new FOS patch, to give our youth as a reward for helping us in this endeavor (bribe the kids, to help us snare the parents, as it were!). It was my idea in fact, to incorporate the "Family of Scouting" logo of the BSA, into the patch itself. The artiste of our staff at that time, however, was our Muguyoh District Paraprofessional, Mr. Orville Sizemore.

Orville had been a l-o-n-g-t-i-m-e volunteer with Tri-State, and being retired from the phone company, he spent his days now as a Parapro with the council. He took the ideas for this patch, worked up a VERY nice sketch, and gave it to Ray - our Council Executive - to order. BAD move.

As we collectors are fond of saying, "Patches are FAR too important, to entrust to the hands of 'perfeshunals.'" ;-) We hadn't really specified a COLOR, before submitting his pencil drawing/sketch to the boss. To this DAY, I STILL couldn't tell you what Ray was thinking (thinking?!?!?) when he ordered it. He mumbled something about "chartruese" after they came in, but that was about it.

As a footnote, Orville & Ray had a falling out about something, shortly after this patch was ordered - I know not what (I'm 99.9% certain though, it was NOT over this patch). Orville not only left the employ of the council - he even left Scouting! Consequently, because this patch turned out SO ugly, it has acquired the nickname in some circles (inside of TSAC-BSA), as, "Orville's Revenge." ;-)


HISTORY OF THIS PATCH

Scouts (especially Cubs) LOVE to get patches, but never have I seen a patch RUIN morale, like THIS one did. As 'perfeshunals,' we gave these out to boys for helping us with our family FOS presentations - holding up our posters during the presentation, collecting the envelopes after folks made their pledge, etc. You reach in your pocket, and tell a boy to come on up, and get his patch - he practically flies up to where you're standing! He's all excited, beaming ear to ear, and THEN... I put THIS (above) in his hand; he glances down at it, and THEN... the smile, turns to confusion, and then... disappointment. He turns to walk back to his seat, his shoulders slump, and by the time he gets there, he's shuffling along crestfallen, at his new... patch.

As if this wasn't enough to kill Scouting Spirit, we used them not ONLY for the 1999 FOS campaign, but for the 2000, and even 2001 campaigns!!! That's because Ray, ordered 5,000 of them!!! For a council that only served 3,000 youth, COUNTING LFL even!

They'd probably STILL be in use today, except that the Lodge Chief during that time - becoming sick of them himself - went to a Fellowship in 2001, and 'sacrificed' at least 1,500 of them in the ceremonial fire that night (soaked in white gas, they ignited the evening's bonfire quite nicely, as I understand!)! Others were given away for occasions other than FOS presentations, and no doubt, a few wandered away with DE's who came and went during that time (at least 3 others, beside myself). That, of course, brings me to my part of the story. :-)


GOT UGLY?

I ended up wandering off with a few myself. With 5,000 of them total, a few get left in coat pockets after presentations, get tossed on a shelf, thrown in a drawer, and then when you move a couple times after that - as I have - they pop up again in unexpected places!

I've actually had GOOD success - posting them on Yahoo and Patch-L - and trading them for a flap a piece, over the years! After all, it's NEVER lost a competition against ANY patch, for title of "Ugliest EVER!" Who WOULDN'T want THAT for a conversation piece (or barf bag filler!)?

I think I am down to my FINAL five, though so if you have a spare flap laying around, don't miss out on YOUR chance to own this... ahhhh... UNIQUE, piece of Scouting infamy. After all, I don't think anyone (in their right mind!) will DELIBERATELY try to top its ugliness! :-o


Bob McCanless
Pittsburgh